I Return to Steven Snider's THE FARM to Discuss THE PRISONER!

The latest episode of Steven Snider's THE FARM PODCAST has just dropped! In the first installment of this epic two-part interview, I return to THE FARM to discuss one of the greatest TV shows of all time... THE PRISONER! I've done a lot of podcast interviews during the past thirteen years or so, but this was definitely one of my favorites.

Topics include Patrick McGoohan, DANGER MAN, Orson Welles, Bertolt Brecht's Theater of Alienation, James Bond, COLUMBO, McGoohan's political beliefs, the influence of McGoohan's Catholicism, George Markstein, Special Operations Executive (SOE), Markstein's journalism career, Markstein's rumored intelligence ties, Inverlair as a model for the Village, mind control/brainwashing, MK-ULTRA/ARTICHOKE, Lincoln Lawrence's WERE WE CONTROLLED?, the Knights Templar, Artificial Intelligence, Electioneering, ESP, and the possible sources of THE PRISONER'S in-depth knowledge of mind control techniques.

If you want to listen to the entire episode, click HERE!

If you want to visit Steven Snider's VISUP blog, click HERE! 

The Cryptoscatology Holiday Double-Crypto Special Continues!!!!

REMINDER: The legendary Guffey Vaults are opening for a limited time only! I'm selling copies of both my first book (CRYPTOSCATOLOGY: CONSPIRACY THEORY AS ART FORM) and my 2024 collection, CRYPTOPOLIS & OTHER STORIES! *CHOKE GASP!* Signed copies of CRYPTOSCATOLOGY are $25.00 and signed copies of CRYPTOPOLIS are $25.00... or you can get both for only $40.00!!! Shipping and handling is included in the price (if you're located in the United States, that is). I'll write whatever you want in the book, within unreason. Offer applies while supplies last! If you're interested, feel free to contact me via my email address: cryptoscatology@gmail.com. MAHALO!!!

PRAISE FOR CRYPTOSCATOLOGY:

 

"Whether you believe or disbelieve in deep and hidden conspiracies, Robert Guffey's droll yet thought-provoking book Cryptoscatology should be required reading. From the valid to the invalid, from the provable to the possible, from real life to art, Guffey shuffles the most prominent names and topics in conspiracyland. They are all laid on the vivisection table with often surprising results. Don't miss this ride." 

 

--JIM MARRS, author of The New York Times Best Sellers Crossfire, Rule by Secrecy, and The Trillion-Dollar Conspiracy

"A sane and penetrating analysis into the murky realm of contemporary theory. Guffey is sure to inform and entertain you with Cryptoscatology."

 

--ALAN CANTWELL, M.D., author of AIDS & the Doctors of Death

 

 "Finally, a scholarly book takes conspiracy theory seriously. I cannot recommend this book highly enough. For fans of science fiction, conspiracy theory or a good spy story (a true story, at that), Cryptoscatology is required reading."

 

 --TESSA B. DICK, author of Philip K. Dick: Remembering Firebright

 

 "Robert Guffey's book, Cryptoscatology: Conspiracy Theory As Art Form, takes the reader on a fast-moving ride through some of the prominent conspiracy theories of our time. It also hopefully gives birth to a new way of thinking about all arcane knowledge and speculation. The author asserts that myth is at least as important as fact, if we would only realize it, especially since we are inventing the myths that sustain our world view, our strength, and our endless curiosity about what lies beyond the cartoon called Reality."

--JON RAPPOPORT, author of The Secret Behind Secret Societies

 

 

PRAISE FOR CRYPTOPOLIS & OTHER STORIES: 

"The stories in Cryptopolis feel like the bloody, star-filled lovechildren of Burroughs and Delany, with each tale ostensibly one part of a greater whole; abstract limbs and organs tethered together by strained flesh. Cryptopolis will take readers on a hallucinogenic journey through worlds fractured by time and place—slipping through liminal dimensions with seamless abandon to unveil unsettling illusions and heartbreaking realities—and totally worth the trip."

--Philip Fracassi, author of Boys in the Valley

 

"If you're tired of the same wines and you're curious about the vintage only just whispered about, have a deep draught of Robert Guffey's Cryptopolis. You don't have to descend with Fortunato to the deepest cellars to find this bottle of Amontillado. Here it is! If Poe collaborated with Robert Anton Wilson...if Borges had a lovechild with Lovecraft, which was subsequently adopted by Kafka...you might get Cryptopolis. I think too that Clark Ashton Smith would admire this collection. Written with the obsessive precision of a mysterious staircase descending into the abyss, Cryptopolis will take you to strange epiphanies..."  

 

--John Shirley, author of The Feverish Stars

 

"Once upon a time, weird and speculative fiction had an underground full of stories that were not written as calling cards or as film treatments or as extended internet memes. Guffey's tales resist genre gentrification; they move into your mind to turn it into a punk house squat!" 

--Nick Mamatas, author of Move Under Ground and The Second Shooter

 

 "In Cryptopolis & Other Stories, Guffey's free-ranging intellect meshes wonderfully with his command of the language."

 

--John Oakes, author of The Fast

 

"Guffey brings together 25 horror shorts that swing wildly between terrifying mindtrips and gritty realism. Throughout, Guffey’s blunt prose lends a sense of normalcy to the fantastic as his cast of losers from all walks of life face the cruelties of their existence—sexual violence, drugs, war, parenthood, and poverty [...]. Though not for the faint of heart, this bizarre and over-the-top collection is sure to thrill devotees of weird fiction."

--Publishers Weekly   

"Cryptopolis may end up being a gateway drug into Robert Guffey’s work. I don’t use that term spuriously. So many of Guffey’s stories in Cryptopolis have a hard-bitten edge and gritty feel to them that I could see him crafting a metatext about an author whose books are physically addictive. Across the collection’s twenty-five stories and vignettes, Guffey displays a range of interests and foci with such depth and heart that I wouldn’t be surprised if he became one of my favorite modern writers [...].

"Affect, the experience of emotional response, seems to be at issue in every one of Guffey’s offerings. From the opening eponymous story (which is the only outright Lovecraftian story in the collection), with its resonances of love as a torturous paralytic, to the last, 'Esthra, Shadows, Glass, Silence,' a parable of alternate lives and lost possibilities, the emotional response drawn from the reader appears to be the crux of every piece. These stories are engines designed to make the reader feel."

--Géza A. G. Reilly, Dead Reckonings

 "If you want a walk on the wild side, and I mean WILD, Robert Guffey’s fiction delivers that and more. It’s as if you’re lying in the grass in a park on a calm summer afternoon, you look up, and a creature you can’t even describe is looking at you. He starts talking in an even voice. But his words are chopping reality to pieces, and when he puts the pieces back together again, and you see the new picture, you feel a need to call the police. But then you realize you’re in a new place where the last people you want to talk to are the cops. What do you do now? You’re on your own. You better have strong resources. Very strong." 

 --Jon Rappoport, author of The Secret Behind Secret Societies

Pete Hegseth's Snuff Films

From Jeffrey St. Clair's 12-5-25 COUNTERPUNCH article entitled "Roaming Charges: Kill, Kill Again, Kill Them All":

Pete Hegseth is a producer of snuff films. The media-obsessed, if not media-savvy, Hegseth has produced 21 of these mass murder documentary shorts in the last three months, featuring the killings of 83 people–if you take his word for it. Hegseth introduces these kill shots like Alfred Hitchcock presenting an episode of his old TV show–without the irony, of course. There’s no irony to Pete Hegseth. No intentional irony, that is. It’s all bluster and protein-powder bravado to titillate the Prime-time Fox audience as they nibbled at their TV dinners.

Who were the people being killed? What did they have in their boats? Where were they going? No one seemed to care. Pete certainly didn’t care. It was the explosion that mattered, the now you see it, now you don’t quality of the videos.

Pete’s snuff films have the mise en scène of a ’90s video game, the zombie slaughter games Pete grew up on, burning callouses onto his thumbs from obsessive use of this joystick.

The irony, lost on Hegseth, is that these are the precise kinds of videos that ethical whistleblowers like Chelsea Manning used to scrape from the secret vaults of the Pentagon and ship to Wikileaks. Videos of crimes committed by US forces. In his dipsomaniacal mind, Hegseth seems to believe these snuff films are proof of the power and virility of the War Department under his leadership. In fact, each video is a confession. The question is: will he be held to account and who will have the guts to do it?

As the Washington Post reported, the very first of Hegseth’s snuff films had a gory epilogue that he chose not to share. Shortly after the smoke cleared from the missile strike, the drone video footage showed that two people had survived the attack and were clinging to the smoking wreckage of the boat, waving their arms in the air for help. The commander of the operation, Navy Adm. Frank Bradley, ordered two more missile strikes: one to kill the survivors and another to destroy the remains of the boat and the bodies of its crew. According to the Post, Bradley was acting under the orders of Hegseth to “kill everybody.”

But the crime that left survivors shouldn’t be obscured by the crime that killed the survivors. Calling them “war crimes” doesn’t seem right, since there’s no declared war, congressional authorization or legal justification for the strikes. Serial mass murder is a far more accurate description.

To read the entire article, click HERE. 

Humor Virus Proof #1,668!

In November of 2017, I published a novel entitled UNTIL THE LAST DOG DIES, which was about a young stand-up comedian who must adapt as best he can to an apocalyptic virus that destroys only the humor centers of the brain. That novel seems to grow more and more prescient with each passing day.

From Steve Large's 11-24-25 CBS News report entitled "Comedian Accused of Threatening California Public Official After Clash During Set":

Court documents show the case allegedly stems from a comedy show at Che'root Lounge in Modesto, where surveillance video shows Anthony Krayenhagen performing and calling out a group of people that included Supervisor Channce Condit for being too loud during his set.

Surveillance video from a day later shows Condit back at Che'root, allegedly complaining about Krayenhagen's behavior toward his group.

Court documents show that Condit alerted the Stanislaus County Sheriff's Office about escalating exchanges with Krayenhagen. On November 12, Condit alleges he received a message on Facebook that said "wassup? Is there still an issue?"

Then, Condit claims he called Krayenhagen and that the comedian yelled obscenities over the phone, allegedly telling Condit he is "green lit," a reference the court documents say is a go-ahead to execute a hit or action on a subject.

Court documents show a Stanislaus County detective assigned to the county's threat assessment center wrote the affidavit for the comedian's arrest warrant that says, "Due to the contemporary culture of mass casualty attacks …and political figure assassinations in the U.S…actions like Krayenhagen are treated as a serious threat and responded to directly."

To read the entire article, click HERE. 

Would you like to see more "Humor Virus" Proofs? If so, you can find them in this CRYPTOPOST and this CRYPTOPOST and this CRYPTOPOST and this CRYPTOPOST!

PRAISE FOR

UNTIL THE LAST DOG DIES

“By turns mystical and ashcan-real, insanely funny and grimly ghastly, Guffey’s novel cuts a zigzag trail through conventionality as it follows Elliot Greeley in his half-serious, half jesting quest for some deeper meaning to existence. If you build your life on laughs, what happens when the laughs disappear? Kissing cousin to Max Barry’s novel Lexicon, about killer language, and to Ben Marcus’s The Flame Alphabet, about language killed, Guffey’s standup debut is standout speculative fiction.”

--Paul DiFilippo, Locus 

“Taps into the cultural zeitgeist…. A nihilistic satire that takes the idea that death is easy and comedy is hard to a whole new level.”

--Kirkus Reviews 

“Guffey’s debut takes full advantage of an absurd, unexpected premise, delivering one of the strangest dystopian novels in a year filled with them.”

--B&N Sci-Fi & Fantasy Blog 

“Guffey’s sardonic, cleverly written comedic debut relies heavily on absurd synchronicity, bold characterization, and heavy irony to make its points about the apocalyptic nature of American humorlessness.”

--Publishers Weekly 

“Not only a novel unique to this [political] moment, but one that is to comedy what Catch-22 was to war. One of the great books of the year.”

--Adam-Troy Castro, Sci Fi Magazine 

“A playful amalgam of Andy Kaufman and Philip K. Dick by way of Shaun of the Dead.”

--Damien Lincoln Ober, author of Doctor Benjamin Franklin's Dream America 

“This satirical tale explores the role of comedy in maintaining a healthy democracy…. A clever concept.”

--Kirkus Reviews

WHERE DID THE ROAD GO?: The Satanic Panic

In the wake of my recent CryptoPosts regarding the never-ending Satanic Panic among the far-right (click HERE, HERE, and HERE), I recommend checking out the July 20, 2024 episode of Seriah Azkath's WHERE DID THE ROAD GO? in which Barbara Fisher and Amber, the Witch of Noccalula, discuss the ongoing negative effects of this extreme paranoia on recent American history...

The Satanic Panic - July 20, 2024:

 

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians (Redux)

 

A beloved holiday ritual has returned to Southern California! For me, the X-Mas season means primarily one thing and one thing only: It's time for Brian Newell's SANTA CLAUS CONQUERS THE MARTIANS to take its rightful place on the boards of the Maverick Theater in Fullerton! This play is based on the not-quite-classic 1964 UFOlogical science fiction film directed by Nicholas Webster.

*SEE* Torg the Technical Wonder stride across the stage! 

*GASP IN AMAZEMENT* as realistic flying saucers whiz directly overhead! 

*MARVEL* at the unbelievably exotic sounds of the Martian "Pshhhhhh" Door! 

If you're persistent enough, you might even persuade Torg the Mechanical Wonder to pose for a photograph with you (see below). 

In 2016, the Los Angeles Times wrote, "A Fullerton holiday tradition began as an incredibly bad movie. Not even that so-bad-it’s-good kind of thing. Just plain bad. Maybe it’s the spirit of Christmas, but decades later, one little community theater has embraced the awfulness of Santa Claus Conquers the Martians and turned a lump of coal into a present that just keeps giving.

"'I don’t know how this became a success,' said [Brian] Newell. 'I had to beg actors to do it. They thought it was a suicide show.'"

And if you want to see this "suicide show" for yourself, you have until Tuesday, December 23rd. Tickets can be ordered right HERE. If all the performances are sold out, which is most likely by this point, I suggest requesting to be placed on the wait list. In the meantime, check out Nicholas Webster's original film (featuring Fritz Hansen's *Astounding* Martian Furniture) directly below...

Santa Claus Conquers the Martians 1964:

And you can see the MYSTERY SCIENCE THEATER 3000 version of the film right here...

MST3K - S03E21 - Santa Claus Conquers the Martians (HD):

THE WARPED REALITY PARANORMAL PODCAST (PART TWO)

Part Two of my recent appearance on THE WARPED REALITY PARANORMAL PODCAST has just dropped! In this episode, we wrap up our discussion of my 2015 book, CHAMELEO, and then move on to talk about my latest book, HOLLYWOOD HAUNTS THE WORLD: AN INVESTIGATION INTO THE CINEMA OF OCCULTED TABOOS, which is now available for purchase from Amazon or directly from the publisher (Headpress)!

Mind Control, Invisible Spies, and Hollywood Conspiracy w/Robert Guffey Part 2:

The Trump, Patel & Bongino Comedy Hour (A Play in Two Acts)

ACT ONE:

From Victor Nava's 11-21-25 NEW YORK POST article entitled "Trump 'Satisfied' with Conclusion
Would-be Assassin Thomas Crooks Acted Alone, FBI Claims: 'No Cover-up Here'":

Would-be assassin Thomas Crooks acted alone and was unknown to law enforcement when he attempted to kill President Trump at a Pennsylvania rally last year, the FBI has determined – a conclusion which officials claimed the president is “satisfied” with.

All of Crooks’ digital accounts, including foreign-based ones, were reviewed as part of the bureau’s exhaustive probe into the deadly July 2024 Trump campaign rally shooting in Butler, which is now listed as “pending, inactive,” FBI Director Kash Patel, Deputy Director Dan Bongino and a senior official directly involved in the investigation told Fox News Digital on Thursday.

“We fully briefed the president, as a victim of this case, at the White House, providing him with all of the details of our investigation, and the president was satisfied with the results and where we left it,” Patel claimed. 

The Crooks case has invited conspiracy theories and accusations that the bureau botched the investigation and stonewalled congressional lawmakers, who are also probing the shooting.

“We have reviewed this case over and over — looked into every nugget. We have spoken to the families, the president — there is no cover-up here,” Bongino declared.

“There is no motive for it, there is no reason for it.”

Patel suggested former FBI Director Christopher Wray is to blame for the conspiracy theories surrounding the case, such as that Crooks, 20, was aided in carrying out the assassination attempt or that there was a second shooter.

“My predecessor went to Congress and said he didn’t know if it was a bullet that hit President Trump in the head. The whole world knew it was a bullet,” Patel said. “For the No. 1 law enforcement officer to say that — it causes a massive disbelief in the institution that Dan and I are now running.”

The director added that “many people make a lot of money on social media pushing conspiracy theories for clicks.”

To read the entire article, click HERE. 

ACT TWO:

From Owen Scott and Maira Butt's 11-11-25 INDEPENDENT article entitled "Every Time Trump Has Sued the Media After He Threatens $1 Billion BBC Legal Action":

Donald Trump has threatened to sue the British Broadcasting Corporation after it aired an edited version of a speech he gave ahead of the 2021 Capitol Riots.

The edited speech was included in part of a Panorama episode, prompting Trump’s lawyers to demanded that the BBC remove the documentary before apologizing and compensating him appropriately.

The letter from the sitting president’s lawyers claims that failure to comply with his demands will lead to the broadcaster being slapped with a lawsuit of “no less” than $1 billion (£760 million).

BBC chair Samir Shah is still considering how to respond to Donald Trump, whom he called a “litigious fellow.”

However, this is far from the first time that Trump has threatened a media company with legal action over perceived damages to his reputation...

To read the entire article, click HERE. 

Norman Rockwell vs. The Department of Homeland Security!

From Francesca Aton's 11-4-25 ARTNEWS article entitled "Norman Rockwell’s Family Speaks Out About Homeland Security’s Misuse of His Artwork":

The descendants of Norman Rockwell are speaking out against social media postings by the U.S. Department of Homeland Security (DHS) that they say misuse the artist’s work.

Since this summer, the DHS has shared reproductions of Rockwell’s paintings on its X, Instagram, and Facebook accounts that promote anti-immigrant rhetoric.

The first, posted on August 20, depicts Rockwell’s Salute the Flag (1971) with the caption, “Protect our American way of life.” The painting predominantly features white people in early to mid-20th century clothing revering the US flag. Together, the painting and caption promote a conservative white populace free from diversity.

The second, posted on September 29, showed Rockwell’s Working on the Statue of Liberty (1946), depicting the famous statue’s raised arm, superimposed with the phrase “Protect your homeland and defend your culture,” along with a link encouraging citizens to “become a homeland defender today.” The caption included a quote from former US president Calvin Coolidge, reading, “Those who do not want to be partakers of the American spirit ought not to settle in America.”

A third, also posted on September 29, featured Rockwell’s And Daniel Boone Comes to Life on the Underwood Portable (1923), depicting a young boy’s vision of the American frontiersman holding a rifle as he writes, accompanied by the caption “Manifest Heroism.”

“If Norman Rockwell were alive today, he would be devastated to see… that his own work has been marshaled for the cause of persecution toward immigrant communities and people of color,” Rockwell’s family wrote in a recently published op-ed article in USA Today [...].

In a statement of solidarity, the Rockwell family concluded their op-ed by saying, “Now is the time to follow in his footsteps and stand for the values he truly wished to share with us and all Americans: compassion, inclusiveness and justice for all.”

This is not the first time that the DHS has misused artwork on their social media accounts to spread bigotry and hateful rhetoric. In July, the DHS shared Thomas Kinkade’s Morning Pledge with the caption “Protect the Homeland.” The artist’s foundation denounced the usage of the painting to promote “division and xenophobia.”

To read the entire article, click HERE. 

THE WRAP: "Conspiracy Theorists Are Right"

From Sharon Waxman's 11-17-25 THE WRAP article entitled "The Epstein Emails Show That Conspiracy Theorists Are Right: ‘Eyes Wide Shut’ Is Real":

The shocking revelation in the trove of 20,000 emails from the sordid world of Jeffrey Epstein is not that crimes were being committed.

It’s more sinister. The emails are disturbing because what they reveal — and in fact prove — is that conspiracy theorists are right. That their theories of full-on corruption in the upper spheres where power lives are valid. That the “Eyes Wide Shut“ cabal of political and financial interests married to sexual deviance depicted in Stanley Kubrick’s 1999 film is not, in fact, fiction. It is reality.

So often journalists like myself attempt to demonstrate to family members and voters in the far reaches of the country, away from centers of power and money, that their conspiracies are false. That politicians are flawed, but that corruption is not the norm. It isn’t how we all operate. 

But the Epstein emails suggest otherwise. They suggest that in fact there is a widespread code among people with power and money who support one another. They are pals no matter what side of the aisle. They are in the club no matter the sins of their members — transgressions that get contextualized, explained away, “understood” [...].

Just a few months after this exchange [with Larry Summers], Epstein was arrested again, this time by the feds, on charges of sex trafficking. As a reminder, the search of his Manhattan townhouse at the time turned up evidence of sex trafficking and “hundreds—and perhaps thousands — of sexually suggestive photographs of fully — or partially —nude females,” according to the indictment. In a locked safe, there were CDs with handwritten labels: “Young [Name] + [Name],” “Misc nudes 1,” and “Girl pics nude.”

“So many people tried to ingratiate themselves with him,” observed Julie K. Brown, the intrepid journalist from The Miami Herald who first exposed Epstein’s crimes and has doggedly pursued the story long after. She hopped on the phone with me on Sunday.

I asked Brown if she thought the emails validated those who believed in wacky Pizzagate-style theories (where Hillary Clinton was bizarrely accused of participating in a pedophile ring).

“What do you mean by conspiracy? (Ghislaine) Maxwell and Epstein — that was a conspiracy,” she said. “And that’s exactly the way they should be looked at. He got away with this. And our criminal justice system is broken. People who have money and power get away with crimes. That’s just a fact. [The email trove] shows that people are willing to overlook even the worst crime if they think that somehow they’re going to benefit.”

She added: “It’s what they call the swamp.”

The swamp is specifically what Donald Trump promised to clean up. But he and Epstein are the swamp.

To read the entire article, click HERE. 

THE BOROWITZ REPORT: "She Says Trump Raped Her When She Was a Child"

In the November 13, 2025 episode of THE BOROWITZ REPORT PODCAST, Andy Borowitz and Kate Manne discuss the February 11, 2016 testimony of the pseudonymous Katie Johnson, who alleges that she was raped by Donald Trump and Jeffrey Epstein when she was thirteen. You can watch the 11-13-25 episode of THE BOROWITZ REPORT by clicking HERE.

You can see Katie Johnson's testimony on YouTube:

Behold!!! the Wonderland Award

O frabjous day! Callooh! Callay! I just received my Wonderland Award for THE EXPECTANT MOTHER DISINFORMATION HANDBOOK...

PRAISE FOR THE EXPECTANT MOTHER DISINFORMATION HANDBOOK:

"Robert Guffey’s The Expectant Mother Disinformation Handbook is weirder than parthenogenesis, weirder than the Republican Party, weirder than the fetishizing of pregnancy that suffuses our culture, weirder than all the back issues of Weird Tales combined. You will laugh, gasp, and scratch your head in pleasurable bemusement. I can’t recommend this tongue-in-cheek tour de force too highly."

—James Morrow, award-winning author of Only Begotten Daughter and Behold the Ape


"Here it is. THE perfect baby-shower/gender reveal party gift. Forget all the binkies, blankies, cute little onesies, and diaper-service subscriptions. Those are so overdone and boring. Want to make a REAL impact? This book. This book right here [...].

"Well-written, lively, engaging, easy to read, and tons of fun. If I were a truly evil imp with plenty of money, I’d sneak copies into every OB/GYN office and ‘Parenting and Family’ bookstore section in the country."

—Christine Morgan, award-winning author of Spermjackers from Hell and Lakehouse Infernal 

 

"We've got plenty of people who think that they know best--better even than a given pregnant woman. We don't need more of them, but we could damn well use more examples of them turned into buffoons just like we get to see in the Handbook [...]. [The Expectant Mother Disinformation Handbook] is often weird, often funny, frightfully well written, and it gives us that unique satisfaction that only fiction can provide by putting the bastards into a magic circle of their own disinformation and locking them away. Isn't it sweet to think that they'd stay there."

 —Géza A. G. Reilly, Dead Reckonings 

A Sneak Preview of THE UPSIDE DOWN MAGICIAN #1

Here's a sneak preview of my debut comic book, THE UPSIDE DOWN MAGICIAN #1, created in collaboration with Nadim, a supernaturally talented artist based in Canada. Visit Nadim's website by clicking HERE.
 

THE UPSIDE DOWN MAGICIAN is an ongoing comic book series about ultraterrestrial paintings, sentient houses, Hieronymus Bosch, government agents, secret societies, and many other concepts that are currently beyond human comprehension. Check back in the near future for information about how to order issue #1! For a brief peek at the Greatness to come, check out the video below...

THE UPSIDE DOWN MAGICIAN #1:

Fun 'n Games with the Strategy of Terror! (A Play in Two Acts)

ACT ONE:

From Gary Fields' and Lindsay Whitehurst's 11-20-25 Associated Press news article entitled "Judge Orders Trump Administration to End National Guard Deployment in DC":

A federal judge on Thursday ordered the Trump administration to end its monthslong deployment of National Guard troops to help police the nation’s capital.

U.S. District Judge Jia Cobb concluded that President Donald Trump’s military takeover in Washington, D.C., illegally intrudes on local officials’ authority to direct law enforcement in the district. She put her order on hold for 21 days to allow for an appeal, however.

District of Columbia Attorney General Brian Schwalb sued to challenge the Guard deployments. He asked the judge to bar the White House from deploying Guard troops without the mayor’s consent while the lawsuit plays out.

Dozens of states took sides in Schwalb’s lawsuit, with their support falling along party lines.

Cobb found that while the president does have authority to protect federal functioning and property, he can’t unilaterally deploy the D.C. National Guard to help with crime control as he sees fit or call in troops from other states.

To read the entire article, click HERE. 

ACT TWO:

From Edward Helmore's 11-27-25 GUARDIAN article entitled "Suspect in Washington DC National Guard Shooting Had Ties to CIA, Agency Confirms":

The suspected shooter of two national guard members in Washington DC on Wednesday worked with CIA-backed military units during the US war in Afghanistan, the agency has confirmed.

The alleged gunman, identified as Rahmanullah Lakanwal, 29, came to the US in September 2021 under an Operation Allies Welcome program that gave some Afghans who had worked for the US government entry visas to the US. He was granted asylum in April this year, under the Trump administration, Reuters reported.

Lakanwal’s ties to the Central Intelligence Agency, which worked alongside US special forces in Afghanistan, were confirmed by the CIA director, John Ratcliffe, to media outlets.

The New York Times reported that the shooting suspect had worked for several US government agencies in Afghanistan, including CIA-backed units in the southern province of Kandahar, a stronghold of the Taliban.

The Washington Post, citing anonymous sources, said those CIA-backed units included counterterrorism squads known as the “zero units”, which were involved in combat missions to seize or kill suspected terrorists.

“The Biden administration justified bringing the alleged shooter to the United States in September 2021 due to his prior work with the US government, including CIA,” Ratcliffe told Fox News digital, adding that Lakanwal’s involvement with the agency was “as a member of a partner force in Kandahar, which ended shortly following the chaotic evacuation”.

The two victims in the attack were named as Sarah Beckstrom, 20, and Andrew Wolfe, 24. Both are members of the West Virginia national guard .

Beckstrom succumbed to her injuries on Thursday evening, Donald Trump said [...].

Both Beckstrom and Wolfe had both been sworn into service less than 24 hours before they were ambushed at a bus stop by the suspect [...].

Following the shooting, Donald Trump ordered 500 additional national guard troops to Washington DC.

To read the entire article, click HERE. 

Adolf Hitler Uunona

1) From Anthony Blair's 11-24-25 NEW YORK POST article entitled "Politician Named Adolf Hitler Set to Win Election in Southern African Country":

A politician called Adolf Hitler is set to win a local election in his home country, but claimed his father had no idea about the Nazi leader’s significance when he named his son.

Adolf Hitler Uunona, 59, is poised to win a second local election in the southwest African country of Namibia on Nov. 26, holding his seat in the north of the country after previously receiving 85% of the vote in 2020.

The member of the left-wing Swapo party previously spoke about his infamous name after coming to global attention following his win in the Ompundja constituency.

His father “probably didn’t understand what Adolf Hitler stood for. As a child, I saw it as a totally normal name,” the politician told German newspaper Bild in 2020.

To read the entire article, click HERE. 

2) From Haley Brown's 11-27-25 NEW YORK POST article entitled "Adolf Hitler Easily Wins Election for Fifth Time in Southern African Country":

Adolf Hitler Uunona, a Namibian politician who shares his name with the infamous Nazi dictator, won re-election for his local seat for the fifth time in a row, according to Euro News.

The 59-year-old cruised to re-election despite his unfortunate name and has no plan to change it.

The local pol said he usually goes by Adolf Uunona in daily life and argued it’s too late to formally change his name.

“It’s in all official documents. It’s too late for that,” he told German newspaper Bild in 2020.

To read the entire article, click HERE. 

The Cryptoscatology Black Friday Double-Crypto Special!!!!

To commemorate the passing of yet another stupid ass holiday, I'm opening up the legendary Guffey Vault for a limited time only. I'm selling copies of both my first book (CRYPTOSCATOLOGY: CONSPIRACY THEORY AS ART FORM) and my 2024 collection, CRYPTOPOLIS & OTHER STORIES! *CHOKE GASP!* Signed copies of CRYPTOSCATOLOGY are $25.00 and signed copies of CRYPTOPOLIS are $25.00... or you can get both for only $40.00!!! Shipping and handling is included in the price (if you're located in the United States, that is). I'll write whatever you want in the book, within unreason. Offer applies while supplies last! If you're interested, feel free to contact me via my email address: cryptoscatology@gmail.com. MAHALO!!!

PRAISE FOR CRYPTOSCATOLOGY:

 

"Whether you believe or disbelieve in deep and hidden conspiracies, Robert Guffey's droll yet thought-provoking book Cryptoscatology should be required reading. From the valid to the invalid, from the provable to the possible, from real life to art, Guffey shuffles the most prominent names and topics in conspiracyland. They are all laid on the vivisection table with often surprising results. Don't miss this ride." 

 

--JIM MARRS, author of The New York Times Best Sellers Crossfire, Rule by Secrecy, and The Trillion-Dollar Conspiracy

"A sane and penetrating analysis into the murky realm of contemporary theory. Guffey is sure to inform and entertain you with Cryptoscatology."

 

--ALAN CANTWELL, M.D., author of AIDS & the Doctors of Death

 

 "Finally, a scholarly book takes conspiracy theory seriously. I cannot recommend this book highly enough. For fans of science fiction, conspiracy theory or a good spy story (a true story, at that), Cryptoscatology is required reading."

 

 --TESSA B. DICK, author of Philip K. Dick: Remembering Firebright

 

 "Robert Guffey's book, Cryptoscatology: Conspiracy Theory As Art Form, takes the reader on a fast-moving ride through some of the prominent conspiracy theories of our time. It also hopefully gives birth to a new way of thinking about all arcane knowledge and speculation. The author asserts that myth is at least as important as fact, if we would only realize it, especially since we are inventing the myths that sustain our world view, our strength, and our endless curiosity about what lies beyond the cartoon called Reality."

--JON RAPPOPORT, author of The Secret Behind Secret Societies

 

 

PRAISE FOR CRYPTOPOLIS & OTHER STORIES: 

"The stories in Cryptopolis feel like the bloody, star-filled lovechildren of Burroughs and Delany, with each tale ostensibly one part of a greater whole; abstract limbs and organs tethered together by strained flesh. Cryptopolis will take readers on a hallucinogenic journey through worlds fractured by time and place—slipping through liminal dimensions with seamless abandon to unveil unsettling illusions and heartbreaking realities—and totally worth the trip."

--Philip Fracassi, author of Boys in the Valley

 

"If you're tired of the same wines and you're curious about the vintage only just whispered about, have a deep draught of Robert Guffey's Cryptopolis. You don't have to descend with Fortunato to the deepest cellars to find this bottle of Amontillado. Here it is! If Poe collaborated with Robert Anton Wilson...if Borges had a lovechild with Lovecraft, which was subsequently adopted by Kafka...you might get Cryptopolis. I think too that Clark Ashton Smith would admire this collection. Written with the obsessive precision of a mysterious staircase descending into the abyss, Cryptopolis will take you to strange epiphanies..."  

 

--John Shirley, author of The Feverish Stars

 

"Once upon a time, weird and speculative fiction had an underground full of stories that were not written as calling cards or as film treatments or as extended internet memes. Guffey's tales resist genre gentrification; they move into your mind to turn it into a punk house squat!" 

--Nick Mamatas, author of Move Under Ground and The Second Shooter

 

 "In Cryptopolis & Other Stories, Guffey's free-ranging intellect meshes wonderfully with his command of the language."

 

--John Oakes, author of The Fast

 

"Guffey brings together 25 horror shorts that swing wildly between terrifying mindtrips and gritty realism. Throughout, Guffey’s blunt prose lends a sense of normalcy to the fantastic as his cast of losers from all walks of life face the cruelties of their existence—sexual violence, drugs, war, parenthood, and poverty [...]. Though not for the faint of heart, this bizarre and over-the-top collection is sure to thrill devotees of weird fiction."

--Publishers Weekly   

"Cryptopolis may end up being a gateway drug into Robert Guffey’s work. I don’t use that term spuriously. So many of Guffey’s stories in Cryptopolis have a hard-bitten edge and gritty feel to them that I could see him crafting a metatext about an author whose books are physically addictive. Across the collection’s twenty-five stories and vignettes, Guffey displays a range of interests and foci with such depth and heart that I wouldn’t be surprised if he became one of my favorite modern writers [...].

"Affect, the experience of emotional response, seems to be at issue in every one of Guffey’s offerings. From the opening eponymous story (which is the only outright Lovecraftian story in the collection), with its resonances of love as a torturous paralytic, to the last, 'Esthra, Shadows, Glass, Silence,' a parable of alternate lives and lost possibilities, the emotional response drawn from the reader appears to be the crux of every piece. These stories are engines designed to make the reader feel."

--Géza A. G. Reilly, Dead Reckonings

 "If you want a walk on the wild side, and I mean WILD, Robert Guffey’s fiction delivers that and more. It’s as if you’re lying in the grass in a park on a calm summer afternoon, you look up, and a creature you can’t even describe is looking at you. He starts talking in an even voice. But his words are chopping reality to pieces, and when he puts the pieces back together again, and you see the new picture, you feel a need to call the police. But then you realize you’re in a new place where the last people you want to talk to are the cops. What do you do now? You’re on your own. You better have strong resources. Very strong." 

 --Jon Rappoport, author of The Secret Behind Secret Societies