Wednesday, May 20, 2026

Reports from Trumplandia: The Maria Schowengerdt Edition


Here's another staccato dispatch from the front lines of Trumplandia by Maria Schowengerdt (to see her previous report, click HERE):

"Lying is second nature to him more than anyone else I have ever met. Trump has the ability to convince himself that whatever he is saying at any given moment is true, or sort of true, or at least ought to be true."

--Tony Schwartz, the Writer credited with "partially" writing THE ART OF THE DEAL in 1987, when, in fact, Schwartz wrote all of it with only Donald Trump supplying cursory, fallacious details.

As far as the made-for-t.v. film based on the book which Trump and Ted Turner announced would be made in 1988?

There's a reason why it was never made: I know what it is but suffice to say, Ted Turner was too kind of a man to ever make a public issue out of it all; he was never one to go out of his way to humiliate some guy he felt sorry for, and like a true winner he only ever publicly challenged or criticized guys who were strong enough to handle it, for instance, guys like Rupert Murdoch.

Speaking of Murdoch: he and Turner were bitter enemies from the early 1980s up until the 21st-century when Turner, spiritually-generous man that he was, decided to finally bury the hatchet with Murdoch--and he did.

They were never fabulous bosom buddies or anything after this, but the public criticisms of each other and the mutual acrimony ended.

The Murdoch-Turner Feud began with a pro-sailing incident then really picked up in earnest after the unprecedented and phenomenal success of CNN due to the U.S.-led Gulf War (aka "Operation Desert Storm" of 1990-91).

Turner's experimental 24/7 news channel, then-hitherto derided as the "Chicken Noodle Network" by Wall Street and the major television networks throughout the 1980s, had suddenly gained absolute relevance and credibility and everyone finally "got it."

Got what? That for Ted Turner and his vision regarding CNN, reality as it happens in real time was always infinitely more fascinating than Fiction.

Which it is.

Then, Rupert Murdoch, that old bastard, made an informal offer to buy CNN from Turner and that's when the real trouble started: of course, Turner refused and then Murdoch plotted his revenge by making calculated moves to establish himself as a "respectable" American citizen from Australia instead of the trashy "King of Tabloid Toilet Paper" that he was known for in England.

He won American citizenship and wanted to buy a baseball team, just like Turner owned (Atlanta Braves), specifically, the Dodgers, and when the vote to admit him (Murdoch) by the MLB was afoot, Turner aggressively lobbied the other Club Owners to veto Murdoch's membership/purchase but unfortunately lost with the majority vote in Murdoch's corner.

Why didn't Turner want Murdoch in the MLB? Because he didn't trust him...what was there to trust?

In 1996, Rupert Murdoch finally got his 24/7 cable news channel: Fox News Channel, an organization "dedicated to conservative values," the goal being to specifically serve as a counter-balance to CNN, which Murdoch deemed too left-leaning--his endeavor, on the surface, fair enough. After all, this is America; conservatives are not to be censured or censored just as liberals ought not to be, either, for this is The American Way.

But what Rupert Murdoch actually did was to deliberately create a 24/7 anti-American, anti-progressive propaganda machine which eventually led to his (Murdoch's) canonization of his old NYC tabloid Party Poster Boy, Donald Trump, as the anointed leader of a "refreshing, new, conservative political vision" which wasn't new at all but was simply an expansion of the petty racist movement which arose during Pres. Barack Obama's two terms in Office known as "The Tea Party," which eventually morphed into "MAGA," "Make America Great Again," a slogan coined by Ronald Reagan during his 1980 Presidential Campaign, which Donald Trump, ever the unimaginative idea thief but savvy opportunist, initially applied for a Trademark on in 2012 and finally won the right to claim legally as his "own" in 2015 so he could reap profits from merchandise during his Presidential campaign that had the Reagan slogan and/or "MAGA" featured.

The only original aspect Trump added was the acronym, "MAGA," but, knowing him, he probably didn't make that up either, but likely an early days' campaign advisor(s) did.

THE ART OF THE STEAL....

Which brings me back to the book, THE ART OF THE DEAL....

It's all just bullshit, plain and simple.

Bullshit.


Donald Trump's 'Art of the Deal' Ghostwriter Tony Schwartz Speaks Out (7-20-16):

 

Reports from Trumplandia: The “Get-out-of-jail-free Card” Edition


From Tierney Sneed and Hannah Rabinowitz's 5-20-26 CNN report entitled "New Settlement Term Bars IRS from Investigating Trump, His Family for Past Tax Issues":

The Internal Revenue Service can’t bring claims against President Donald Trump, his family or businesses for past tax issues, according to additional terms added Tuesday to the settlement the Justice Department reached with Trump to resolve his $10 billion lawsuit against the IRS.

The additional terms, first reported by Politico, were quietly added in a hyperlink to Monday’s Justice Department press release that contained an agreement to create a nearly $1.8 billion fund to compensate people or organizations that have been “weaponized” by past administrations — a fund widely expected to benefit Trump’s allies, including January 6, 2021, US Capitol rioters.

This additional settlement term is an extraordinary step that Trump’s own administration has taken that benefits him and his family directly.

Acting Attorney General Todd Blanche made no mention of the additional term during testimony before a Senate committee earlier Tuesday.

Trump’s lawsuit — and how the Trump administration resolved it — has been labeled “self-dealing” by the president’s critics, since Trump controls the executive branch agencies that were deciding how to respond to a lawsuit he brought in his personal capacity. Trump abruptly dropped the case after signals that the judge could probe whether it was a legitimate legal dispute belonging in court.

According to the new document, dated Tuesday and signed by acting Attorney General Todd Blanche, the federal government is “FOREVER BARRED and PRECLUDED” from prosecuting or pursuing “claims” or “examinations” arising from matters pending before the IRS, including “tax returns” filed by Trump before the agreement was reached. The language applies not just to Trump, but to his family, trusts, companies and other affiliates.

The Justice Department did not answer CNN’s inquiry about why the additional terms were published belatedly. 

To read the entire article, click HERE

Monday, May 18, 2026

Reports from Trumplandia

From Josh Marcus' 5-17-26 INDEPENDENT article entitled "Trump 'Doesn’t Care' About Midterm Results and Is Resigning Himself to Republican Losses":

Asked earlier this week whether he was considering Americans’ finances amid ongoing inflation because of the Iran war, the president said he isn’t even thinking about it.

“I don't think about Americans’ financial situation — I don’t think about anybody,” Trump told reporters.

To read the entire report, click HERE



San Diego Shooting

From a 5-18-26 ABC 10News report entitled "Three Victims Killed, Two Suspects Dead After Shooting at Islamic Center of San Diego":

Three victims were killed, and two suspects are dead after a shooting at the Islamic Center of San Diego on Monday, San Diego Police confirmed in a news conference.

The San Diego Police Department said all three of the victims were adult men.

The two suspects were identified only as two teenagers. Police said the two suspects appear to have died from self-inflicted gunshot wounds.

San Diego Police Department officials said they began receiving reports of the incident at around 11:40 a.m. at the mosque at 7050 Eckstrom Avenue, near Balboa Avenue. Just after 12 p.m., police confirmed an active shooter situation was ongoing and urged the public to avoid the area.

In an update on Twitter/X at 1:06 p.m., police said, "The threat at the Islamic center has been neutralized."

To read the entire article, click HERE

Saturday, May 16, 2026

Humor Virus Proof #1,670!

In November of 2017, I published a speculative novel entitled UNTIL THE LAST DOG DIES, which was about a young stand-up comedian who must adapt as best he can to an apocalyptic virus that destroys only the humor centers of the brain. Halfway through the book, the comedian contracts the illness himself. As evidenced by recent events, that novel seems to grow more and more prescient with each passing day. Case in point... 

NEWS FLASH! THIS JUST IN: HUMOR VIRUS PROOF #1,670! CLICK HERE TO SEE UNDENIABLE EVIDENCE OF THE INSIDIOUS HUMOR VIRUS CONTINUING TO WORSEN!!!

Would you like to see more "Humor Virus" Proofs? If so, you can find them in this CRYPTOPOST and this CRYPTOPOST and this CRYPTOPOST and this CRYPTOPOST and this CRYPTOPOST and this CRYPTOPOST! 

PRAISE FOR

UNTIL THE LAST DOG DIES

“By turns mystical and ashcan-real, insanely funny and grimly ghastly, Guffey’s novel cuts a zigzag trail through conventionality as it follows Elliot Greeley in his half-serious, half jesting quest for some deeper meaning to existence. If you build your life on laughs, what happens when the laughs disappear? Kissing cousin to Max Barry’s novel Lexicon, about killer language, and to Ben Marcus’s The Flame Alphabet, about language killed, Guffey’s standup debut is standout speculative fiction.”

--Paul DiFilippo, Locus 

“Taps into the cultural zeitgeist…. A nihilistic satire that takes the idea that death is easy and comedy is hard to a whole new level.”

--Kirkus Reviews 

“Guffey’s debut takes full advantage of an absurd, unexpected premise, delivering one of the strangest dystopian novels in a year filled with them.”

--B&N Sci-Fi & Fantasy Blog 

“Guffey’s sardonic, cleverly written comedic debut relies heavily on absurd synchronicity, bold characterization, and heavy irony to make its points about the apocalyptic nature of American humorlessness.”

--Publishers Weekly 

“Not only a novel unique to this [political] moment, but one that is to comedy what Catch-22 was to war. One of the great books of the year.”

--Adam-Troy Castro, Sci Fi Magazine 

“A playful amalgam of Andy Kaufman and Philip K. Dick by way of Shaun of the Dead.”

--Damien Lincoln Ober, author of Doctor Benjamin Franklin's Dream America 

“This satirical tale explores the role of comedy in maintaining a healthy democracy…. A clever concept.”

--Kirkus Reviews

Thursday, May 14, 2026

Ballads of a Barstool Prophet



HEADS-UP! My friend and former creative writing student, Chris Mardiroussian, has just released his latest book, BALLADS OF A BARSTOOL PROPHET, a collection of 47 poems overflowing with absurd degradation and degrading absurdity in equal measures. Here's the publisher's ballyhoo:

Poetry usually wants to sit you down, look into your soul, and have a Very Serious Talk. This collection would rather buy you a drink, tell you a terrible joke, and leave before the tab comes.

BALLADS OF A BARSTOOL PROPHET explores the gritty realities of the human spirit and is a glimpse into the lives of lost souls, seeking solace in the hazy glow of dimly lit taverns, navigating the chaotic dance between alcohol, loneliness, and the human spirit. These poems are quick, clever, and just self-aware enough to know they’re being ridiculous, but are a brutal reminder that life's beauty lies not in perfection, but in the cracks and imperfections that make us who we are. Drawing inspiration from the comedic timing of Hunter S. Thompson, the sharp dialogue of David Mamet, and Charles Bukowski's unmatched ability to strip away pretense and reveal the raw essence of humanity, BALLADS OF A BARSTOOL PROPHET captures the essence of life's beauty amid its most profound struggles. 

These poems are a toast to the flawed, the broken, and the real, leaving readers with an indelible mark on their hearts and a deeper understanding of the human experience. 

This book is for people who love words, but don’t want them to be boring.

I would be remiss if I didn't mention the fact that this book sports a striking wraparound cover by Nadim Mahi-Bahi, a supernaturally talented artist who is collaborating with me on a forthcoming comic book entitled THE UPSIDE DOWN MAGICIAN. (For a sneak preview of THE UPSIDE DOWN MAGICIAN, click HERE.) And you can check out Nadim's website by clicking right HERE.

Buy a copy of BALLADS OF A BARSTOOL PROPHET today!!! 

FYI: Chris is also launching a bold new publishing venture called FOUL MOUTH PRESS. As Dr. Steve Brule would say, "Check it out!"

  

Monday, May 11, 2026

I Return to Steven Snider's THE FARM to Discuss... HOLLYWOOD HAUNTS THE WORLD! (Part Two)


In the latest episode of THE FARM PODCAST, Steven Snider and I conclude our discussion of my Rondo Award-nominated book,
HOLLYWOOD HAUNTS THE WORLD: AN INVESTIGATION INTO THE CINEMA OF OCCULTED TABOOS

Topics include Walter Bowart, OPERATION MIND CONTROL, James Shelby Downard, the origin of the word "cryptocracy," THE MORNING OF THE MAGICIANS, Albert Einstein, Jack Parsons, L. Ron Hubbard, Marjorie Cameron, TWIN PEAKS, David Lynch, Mark Frost, J. Michael Straczynski, BABYLON 5, STAR TREK: DEEP SPACE NINE, predictive programming, Vince Gilligan, Cordwainer Smith, Larry Cohen, Bela Lugosi, Surrealism, German Expressionism, Universal horror films, Edgar Ulmer, Val Lewton, Budd Boetticher, the role fiction plays in addressing taboos, how hidden truths can be found in conspiracy theories and cult films, etc.

If you want to listen to the entire episode, click HERE.

If you want to visit Steven Snider's VISUP blog, click HERE.


PRAISE FOR HOLLYWOOD HAUNTS THE WORLD: 
 
"In HOLLYWOOD HAUNTS THE WORLD, Robert Guffey takes his readers for a trip behind the magic curtain to reveal the true Wizards at work - those behind the lenses, making magic and moving the secret levers. To this end, Guffey plays the role of Toto, tearing the curtain aside to reveal these flesh and bone Wizards of the military-industrial-entertainment complex, and the occult role they play in influencing our inner dreams and everyday realities."

--Adam Gorightly,  
author of SAUCERS, SPOOKS, AND KOOKS
and THE SHADOW OVER SANTA SUSANA: BLACK MAGIC, MIND CONTROL, AND THE MANSON FAMILY MYTHOS


"Hollywood has truly haunted the world. So too should this book, one of the best ever written on American cinema."

--Gary D. Rhodes,
author of THE PERILS OF MOVIEGOING IN AMERICA and TOD BROWNING'S DRACULA, 
from his Foreword
 
"A heady, occult-driven exploration of cinema!"
 
--Larry Wade Carrell,
director of GIRL NEXT, THE QUANTUM DEVIL, and THE DARKSIDE OF SOCIETY
 
 "This is a fascinating, mind-expanding trip into some seriously dark corners."
 
--CINEMA RETRO 
 
 "[An] enjoyable trip from a tour guide likely (and proudly) on at least one agency watchlist."
 
--FLICK ATTACK 
 
"Highest recommendation!"
 
--Stephen R. Bissette,
writer/artist of TYRANT, CRYPTID CINEMA, and SAGA OF THE SWAMP THING