Friday, May 15, 2015

Stripper v. Senator

It's QUIZ TIME, kids!  Instructions:  Read the following excerpts from Jenny Kutner's 5-13-15 Salon article entitled "Texas Stripper Requests Police Protection from Conservative Christian State Senator," then answer the postgraduate quiz question below:
"Cynthia Lynn Ortiz [an Oklahoma woman who works as a dancer at a 'gentlemen’s club'] filed a handwritten request for [a] protective order in Creek County, Oklahoma, where she claims she moved after [Republican State Senator Charles] Perry began stalking her in 2010.  Ortiz says she met the lawmaker at a Lubbock, Texas Republican Women’s event in 2009, but later relocated to Denton, Texas, and then to Oklahoma, when he would not leave her alone.  According to the protective order request — of which Ortiz posted a photo on Twitter — Perry recruited acquaintances to help him keep tabs on the woman.
"'I could not go outside without one coming to watch especially if I was on the phone,' Ortiz’s request states.  'A man in a brown truck would follow me everywhere I went.'
"Ortiz also claims the lawmaker hacked her computer, interfered with her relationships and her work, vandalized her car and installed surveillance cameras in her home, according to The Oklahoman."
Question:  In 21st century America, is it more reasonable to assume that A) a stripper in Oklahoma is suffering from acute paranoia or that B) a right-wing Christian Senator in Texas has access to a vast network of gang stalking perps who would not hesitate to plant covert surveillance cameras in the private residence of a U.S. citizen, vandalize said individual's automobile, disrupt said individual's relationships at work and elsewhere, and hack into said individual's personal computer?
If your answer was B, kids, give yourself a gold star!
If your answer was A, you may review your grade by clicking HERE.
And if you would like to read Ms. Kutner's entire article, simply click HERE.

Sunday, May 10, 2015

CHAMELEO Book Signing at BOOK SOUP in West Hollywood!

CHAMELEO fans, take heed!  On June 5th I’ll be discussing and signing CHAMELEO at Book Soup located at 8818 W. Sunset Blvd., West Hollywood, CA 90069.  The reading begins at 7:00 PM.  The entire event will probably last about 90 minutes.  Copies of CHAMELEO will be on sale at Book Soup.  The event is completely free, and—needless to say—invisible midgets are more than welcome to attend.  Don’t miss what the in-house dossiers of the NCIS and the Department of Homeland Security are calling “THE MUST-SEE EVENT OF THE SUMMER SEASON!!!”  If you like winning prizes, you should definitely drop by:  Those of you who don’t already have a government-sponsored, voyeuristic perp taking note of your every move will almost certainly be assigned one at the door.  Yes, indeed, there’s something for everyone at any CHAMELEO event! 

For further details, click HERE.

Thursday, May 7, 2015

Keep Yer Eye on the Cacti!

According to Paul Joseph Watson of, "The town of Paradise Valley in Arizona has installed license plate scanning cameras in fake cactuses with no public consultation whatsoever, just days after the DHS [Department of Homeland Security] announced its intention to revive a nationwide version of the program. Residents were alarmed to see the cactus cameras popping up throughout the town over the last few days with no indication of what they were being used for as city officials refused to explain their purpose until all the cameras were installed."  

Watson's 5-7-15 article, entitled "Town Installs License Plate Scanning Cameras in Cactuses," goes on to report that town leaders "initially declined to even talk to local station Fox 10 about the cameras, with Paradise Valley Police saying they were 'not prepared to make a statement at this time.' The network was similarly rebuffed when they attempted to get answers on license plate scanners that were being installed in traffic lights back in February.
"Fox 10’s Jill Monier was eventually able to speak to Town Manager Kevin Burke, who admitted that the cameras were being used to 'run license plates of cars against a hotlist database.'
"When asked why officials had been secretive about the cameras, which are being placed on the perimeter of the town, Burke asserted that there was 'nothing to hide' and that the cameras wouldn’t be activated until privacy concerns had been addressed.
"'Shouldn’t that have been vetted before they even went up?' asked Monier, to which Burke responded, 'It probably is fair.'
"The cameras are part of a $2 million 'technology upgrade' passed by the council last year. It is not known whether the Department of Homeland Security contributed to this figure, although the DHS has funded the introduction of license plate scanners in other cities."
In the decided opinion of, these camouflaged cameras would have been far more aesthetically pleasing if the state of Arizona had hired world famous Gonzo artist Ralph Steadman to design the cacti.  Alas, this idea did not occur to them.
To read Watson's entire article (and watch the aforementioned Fox 10 news report), simply click HERE.

Wednesday, May 6, 2015

Fake Police Force

From today's Los Angeles Times comes this peculiar story entitled "Bizarre Fake Police Force Included Kamala Harris Aide, Prosecutors Say" by Joseph Serna, Javier Panzar and Matt Hamilton.  Here are some choice excerpts:

Los Angeles County Sheriff's Capt. Roosevelt Johnson thought it was odd when three people — two of them dressed in police uniforms he didn't recognize — strolled into the Santa Clarita station in February.
One man introduced himself as chief of the Masonic Fraternal Police Department and told Johnson this was a courtesy call to let him know the agency was setting up shop in the area.
They met for 45 minutes, Johnson said, but he was left confused and suspicious — so much so that he immediately ordered deputies to pull station surveillance video so they would have images of the visitors. He also assigned detectives to check them out.
"It was an odd meeting," the captain recalled.  "It just raised my suspicion level."
This week, the three people were charged with impersonating police officers. They are David Henry, who told Johnson he was the police chief, Tonette Hayes and Brandon Kiel, an aide to state Atty. Gen. Kamala Harris.
It turns out Henry, Hayes and Kiel had allegedly introduced themselves to police agencies across the state, though it is unclear why. A website claiming to represent their force cites connections to the Knights Templars that they say go back 3,000 years. The site also said that the department had jurisdiction in 33 states and Mexico.
“When asked what is the difference between the Masonic Fraternal Police Department and other police departments, the answer is simple for us. We were here first!” the website said.
Los Angeles County prosecutors said the whole effort was a ruse, though for what purpose remains unclear. The investigation is continuing.
Johnson said Kiel did most of the talking during their meeting. Kiel said in addition to his police position, he worked for Harris. When Kiel departed, Johnson said, he left his card from the state Department of Justice [...].
Employees at the Backwoods Inn restaurant in Santa Clarita remember a day about a month ago when [David] Henry — a regular customer — walked in with a swagger.
He wore a dark blue police uniform with badges and insignia on both arms. He told the staff at the country western-themed eatery off the Sierra Highway he was a police chief and handed out his business card with pride.
It read MASONIC FRATERNAL POLICE DEPARTMENT in capital letters and identified Henry as Chief Henry 33.

“He carried himself like a cop, his uniform was spot on to a regular cop uniform, we all thought he was a legit cop,” said a chef at the restaurant. Henry regularly brought in his children.
Employees said Henry told them the department had set up offices in a strip mall next to a storefront church in Santa Clarita.
Church members said they didn't talk to their neighbors but said they saw a few men come and go dressed in sharp suits. They drove a black Lincoln town car with no license plates.
“We thought they were a security company,” said one church member.
To read the entire article, simply click HERE.
(The website for the "Masonic Fraternal Police Department" can be found HERE.)

Monday, May 4, 2015

The Gods of Appeasement and Cowardice

In this brave new world known as the 21st century, it's heartening to see that not everyone has chosen to kneel down before the Gods of Appeasement and Cowardice.  I highly recommend reading these three very important articles....

First, from the 4-29-15 edition of The Spectator, comes Nick Cohen's "Charlie Hebdo:  The Literary Indulgence of Murder."

Next, from the 5-3-15 edition of The New York Times, comes Andrew R. Chow's "After Protest Over Award, Neil Gaiman and Art Spiegelman Agree to Be Table Hosts at PEN GALA."

And lastly, from the 5-4-15 edition of the L.A. Times, comes David L. Ulin's "Why I Didn't Sign the Charlie Hebdo Protest Letter."

Adventures in Neuroscience

Just a few days ago, an eagle-eyed correspondent sent me a link to a 4-23-15 Pacific Standard article entitled "Anxious?  Consider Invisibility" by Nathan Collins in which we learn that a pair of researchers named Arvid Guterstam and Zakaryah Abdulkarim--graduate students at the Karolinska Institutet in Stockholm, Sweden--are experimenting with the use of cloaking technology to reduce social anxiety.  (Though it should go without saying, of course, I feel compelled to point out that we here at don't make this stuff up, folks!)  CHAMELEO fans, please note the presence of mysterious virtual reality goggles in the featured photograph.  To read the entire article, simply click HERE.

Study co-author Zakaryah Abdulkarim (middle) creates the invisible body illusion on a participant (left) wearing a set of head-mounted displays connected to a pair of cameras. (Photo: Staffan Larsson)

UFOs Over San Diego

More High Weirdness in San Diego....

From 4-30-15, courtesy of, comes Laura McVicker's article "Mysterious Lights Spotted South of Downtown San Diego."  Click HERE to read the article and see the remarkably clear footage of the "mysterious lights."  Are these modern day foo fighters being controlled by creatures from another world or military dingbats with a hell of a lot of time on their hands... or someone (or something) else entirely?