The Alpha/Omega Cryptoscatology Black Friday Special!!!

To commemorate the passing of yet another stupid ass holiday, I'm opening up the legendary Guffey Vault for a limited time only. I'm selling copies of both my first book (CRYPTOSCATOLOGY: CONSPIRACY THEORY AS ART FORM) and my latest book (DEAD MONKEY RUM)! *CHOKE GASP!* Signed copies of CRYPTOSCATOLOGY are $20.00 and signed copies of DEAD MONKEY RUM are $20.00... or you can get both for only $35.00!!! Shipping and handling is included in the price (if you're located in the United States, that is). I'll write whatever you want in the books, within unreason. Offer applies while supplies last! If you're interested, feel free to contact me via my email address: cryptoscatology@gmail.com. MAHALO!!!

 PRAISE FOR CRYPTOSCATOLOGY:

 

"Whether you believe or disbelieve in deep and hidden conspiracies, Robert Guffey's droll yet thought-provoking book Cryptoscatology should be required reading. From the valid to the invalid, from the provable to the possible, from real life to art, Guffey shuffles the most prominent names and topics in conspiracyland. They are all laid on the vivisection table with often surprising results. Don't miss this ride." 

 

--Jim Marrs (author of The New York Times Best Sellers Crossfire, Rule by Secrecy, and The Trillion-Dollar Conspiracy)

"A sane and penetrating analysis into the murky realm of contemporary theory. Guffey is sure to inform and entertain you with Cryptoscatology."

 

--Alan Cantwell, M.D. (AIDS & the Doctors of Death)

 

 "Finally, a scholarly book takes conspiracy theory seriously. I cannot recommend this book highly enough. For fans of science fiction, conspiracy theory or a good spy story (a true story, at that), Cryptoscatology is required reading."

 

 --Tessa B. Dick (Philip K. Dick: Remembering Firebright)

 

PRAISE FOR DEAD MONKEY RUM:

"Robert Guffey's fantastic novel, DEAD MONKEY RUM, will at least bring your brain out of a coma, if not get your imagination off the couch. This is a thinly masked tribute/adventure to the late Stanislaw Szukalski and his boundless imagination. This book is a mental gymnasium."

-- Robert Williams (Visual Addiction, Hysteria in Remission, and Through Prehensile Eyes)

 

"A fantastically rich and entertaining piece of work with an original sharp edge."

 -- Jim Woodring (writer/artist of Weathercraft, The Frank Book, and One Beautiful Spring Day)

 

"Stanislaw Szukalski would love DEAD MONKEY RUM. This novel is addictive like a heavy drug. Make space in your calendar to read it all."

-- Irek Dobrowolski (director of the Netflix documentary, Struggle: The Life and Lost Art of Szukalski)

 

 "Yetis, Tiki Gods, Cryptozoology, and rum-filled adventure! Sign me up and tell me when the ship sails! I'm recommending this Robert Guffey novel to all my friends, family, and foes to take their minds completely off whatever they are thinking about. Wonderful."

-- Loren Coleman (Mysterious America, The Field Guide to Lake Monsters and Sea Serpents, The Field Guide to Bigfoot, Curious Encounters, and 40 other books - Director of the International Cryptozoology Museum)

 
"DEAD MONKEY RUM succeeds at being a pursuit thriller, with suspense and tension as the monkey and Stephanie evade their cryptid enemies, and comedy as the two exchange jabs at each other. It is cinematically fast. DEAD MONKEY RUM should be adapted to a [...] Ralph Bakshiesque animated film where both the zaniness of the narrative and the latent satire would really flourish."

-- Exotica Moderne